5 years ago tonight I had a life threatening AVM rupture that changed my life forever.
But I was too stubborn to accept all the limitations the doctors told me I would have, and continue to fight daily against the deficits I was left with to make the most out of the 2nd chance at life I’ve been given! I’ve come a long way in 5 years!
Many of you have been with me through this entire ordeal and I want to give you all my love and appreciation!!
Everything happens for a reason, even my brain blowout! And even though I’ve had tons of curve balls thrown at me over the past 5 years, both medical and personal, I’m happy and living a great life.
Even my long term deficits are becoming more livable as I adjust to my new normal. Granted, that old life I had and that person I was before the rupture are gone. But I’ve made peace with the new me and although I will always try to improve, heal and move forward, even if I can’t, I’m all right.
I always half jokingly tell people that I can feed myself and wipe myself, and I still have lots of people in my life who love me. That’s more than a lot of people have – brain aneurism or not!
Many people have told me how inspirational I am for getting this far. And while I appreciate the sentiment, I don’t really feel inspirational. I didn’t really have much of a choice. It was either accept the dire picture they painted and roll over and die, or fight back and carve a new life out of the new hand I had been dealt.
Honestly, I was just too fricking stubborn to die or to follow all the limits that I was told I would have to live with for the rest of my life. Not quite inspirational, but there you have it. LOL!
So today, if you are so inclined – raise a glass to stubbornness and perseverance, and take the time to tell every single person in your life who means something to you exactly how you feel. You never know when will be the last time you get to speak to them or see them.
I was so incredibly lucky to learn that lesson and now I tell all those I love how I feel–often! Even my friends have gotten used to hearing “I love you,” from me. Because they are important to me and my life, then and now, wouldn’t be what it is today without them.
So if you want to take any inspiration from my struggles – grab life with both hands and wring every bit of happiness you can from it! Don’t let anyone set limits on you and what you can accomplish. Get out there and LIVE!
For those of you scratching your head at what this whole brain blowout ordeal is all about – here’s the blog about it I wrote in rehab to “get it out” and start the grieving for the life I had lost and start to accept the new life I would live.
Just for memory lane – here’s me a month after I got out of the hospital. My hair is starting to grow out and the red dot on my forehead is still very visible where they put the clamp (front and back) to saw off the bone flap of my skull for the craniotomy. Fun stuff…LOL! I’m looking pretty rough, but after 51 days in the hospital, I’m surprised I don’t look even worse.
My thoughts looking back at this picture? Damn my nose looks big with my hair so short! LOL…
Blessings and love to you all!